Updates on the crazyness that is my "love life"...

So, my birthday is at the end of next month and I am going to visit "Aduli". He tried to get me to also come for his birthday at the beginning of next month, but I have mock trial practice the day of his birthday and have to be back in Austin....sadness I know.

But the point is, im actually very excited about this for a couple of reasons...one more physical than the other. lol. So basically, we've been friends for about 7 years. And we've talked about everything for hours upon hours upon hours. And eventually we started tackling different subjects. At first, we just talked about how our days were, or what was bothering us and things like that. Then after a couple of years, we started talking about our love lives, things that we liked or disliked. Then after about year 4, we started talking about our actual feelings...not feelings toward each other, but just feelings and like really deep stuff. Then, we ventured into saying "sexual" things to each other...and like not in a lewd way, but I would always be like, "don't say anything nasty or inappropriate to me"...just because that wasn't our relationship and we were just friends.

Then started law school and he started for really working. I think it was at that point that our relationship changed from being a teenager like friendship (even though we were like 23/24 at that time) to like an adult friendship. And then the latest step...the step after the visit. We were actually for really honest about how we felt about each other, and the visit and everything like that. THEN, we started talking on the PHONE....whaaaaaat?!?!?!?!? That may not seem like a really big deal or anything, but it was kinda like an unspoken rule that we did not speak on the phone as a way of kinda keeping our feelings for each other in check. In 7 years, we talked on the phone a total of......2 times. The first time was 3 years ago when I visited DC and I didn't have internet and he sang happy birthday to me last birthday. BUT then of late, we've been talking to each other a couple of times a week. And we literally talk about everything....we sing christmas carols and even explored the foray of "sensual storytelling" (which by the way is awesome....sensual storytelling is NOT the equiv. of phone sex ok....don't be gross).

But no joke...I'm kinda living freely for the first time in a really long time, and I absolutely love it. The whole reason I wouldn't talk to him on the phone or not allow us to talk about our feelings is because I feel so incredibly strong for him and it scares me. I don't want him to be able to hurt me and because I've known him for so long, I know that he will be able to. But honestly, even if I do end up getting hurt, it will be worth it because of how he makes me feel.

And I'm not trying to jinx anything, but this really is kinda crazy to me. He's never been able to keep interest in a girl that he's dating for longer than a month. And this is girls IN DC. And even though we aren't dating, i've kept him leashed for about 2 months and I'm 1700 miles away. And he even said it. We were talking yesterday and he was like, "I'm not even going to lie, I am still completely enthralled by you. You'd think I'd be over you by now but it (our experience together....we did not relate) was just that good/amazing...just know I think VERY highly of you." And that is like one of the best compliments I think I have ever gotten, simply because I think it took a lot for him to even say that to him.

But I'm just so excited because I know he's excited to see me too. He just keeps mentioning it too. Loving it. Talking about, "Think of you're visit as the best first date you will ever have in your life. You and me together for 48 entire hours. I'll take you out, do some cultural things and the rest of your time just blow your mind"....does that explain why I'm a little excitable? That's my DUDE son.....

Effing Gracious

What is this that is going on? Is it a result of boredom or possibly of something else? Who knows. I just know that I wish I didn't think about this dude as much as I do. It's like, really...it shouldnt be this crucial for me at this juncture, but for some reason...I just have this intense feeling. But is the feeling for him, or am I just happy that I am finally able to feel again? Only time will tell I suppose. Possibly in a month, when we see each other again, I will be able to tell if there is something more, however, until them...I just wish I didn't think about him like I do.

Almost wanna go back to the times of not feeling...like I've done for the past 3 years. Dang man. Effing this ish up for me.

My Upcoming Birthday

So... since this is my year that I am treating myself and living for ME and doing what the flip I want to do. I am going to see one of my favorite pianists because he's playing ON my birthday. Yeah does it matter that it is Thursday and I have class on Thursdays? Naw not really...I've never really celebrated my birthday before in 25 years of life, so I am doing it for the 26th dammit. Taking Thursday through Sunday off for ME.

I'm not playing. Finna let loose. Yessir! Super excitable x43.

Slight Job Related Stress

So.....I really need to get this freaking PMF fellowship OK. Like the need is not a joke right now. My dad is freaking out about my decision to take the bar in Maryland. His main "supposed" argument is because I don't have a job as of yet. But I know that it is mainly because he wants me to be in California closer to him. But what did I say? I am not living my life for anyone else right now except myself.

The only thing about the PMF fellowships is that they are not attorney positions. But do I want to do legal work anyway? I guess I've always really wanted to do work in federal government... so does it really matter? But if I did get appointed as a fellow at an agency, I would still take the bar because that would just be silly now.... Silly. Oh I really hope I get this!

My Final Answer

So I have decided to make a decision that I was too chicken to make 3 years ago...I'm moving back to Maryland. Yes. I am. Why? Because I've wanted to be there for the past 6 years of my life, but it didn't quite match up. And finally, I am given a fresh start, so I am going to do what I want to do with my own life.

And this is a decision for ME. I'm making it only because and for ME. After I graduate in May, I'm going to move to MD and take the bar. I am in the selection process for a federal fellowship as well as a couple of possible judicial clerkships so I have possibilities. But if all of these fall through, I still think I need to be over there in order to establish a network and relationships for people to hire me.

And I'm following my moms words, if it doesn't work out, I can always come back to California, and see what's good there. But its about time that I start taking some chances in my life. Tired of living scared and living "logically".

WTF immem?

Just what do you call yourself doing merging with myspace music? Huh? That's mad rude yo! I don't wanna have no damn account with anything myspace related...and you just think its ok to take away my imeem stuff without warning? Eff you son!

Come on now Eldrick

I'm only spending a couple of sentances about this little effer cuz I can't stand him. But the "Tiger" thing...why all the media attention? Because people thought Tiger was beyond the black male athlete stereotype. He tried so hard to convince people that he wasn't black and I guess the majority of poeple kinda bought into that. And now that he DOES fall into that category, people are flipping the freak out. HA.

I told ya'll he was a punk from get.

Bumpits

WTF is up with that bumpits commerical? I mean really? Those hairstyles look highly atrocious. It's like trailer trash hairstyles gone bad...or even Jersey Girl hairstyles. Take you pick man. Super extra a mess.

Their Eyes Were Watching God

So I've read the book a couple of times. Loved it each time I've read it. My favorite book infact that is until "Mama Day" came along.

Point being, I watched Oprah's version of it...and OMG. All I can say is Tea Cake, Tea Cake, Tea Cake! Freaking Michael Ealy oh my goodness. I never thought he was hot until that movie. He was unnecessarily sexy up in here. Especially the part where they went to the Everglades and they were dancing and Halle Berry gave him that thing to eat of her hand....whaaaaaaat!!!!! I bout fell off the couch. And they kept showing close ups of his freaking lips. I woulda effed the brakes off that dude. Like my goodness. It really was not a joke at that point.

Have to check out some more of his movies man...

Limbo-mania

So I'm still in this really weird mode right now. It is all kinds of wow. I am trying not to be overanalytical typical girl, but um yeah.... I just have no earthly idea what's going on. We're still friends, but are we more than that? I mean it doesnt matter as nothing can materialize for at least 6 months...but it would be a nice thing to just.....know.

So about a month and a half ago, I went to DC and kinda had a three days and nights of awesomeness. I went to go to a conference, but I stayed with one of my guy friends, who I met my first year of college...we'll call him...Aduli (for some reason, that's what my best friend has named him, so we will use that name here to protect all parties involved).

Just to get a little background on the "relationship". We met my freshman year in college...I was an athlete and he was my student athletic trainer. lol. Funny I know. So we kinda hit it off from the get go...as friends though. There has always been this undescribed chemistry between us. Long story short, we kept in contact even though I changed schools and moved across the country.

So for the past 6 years, we've just talked on aim/gchat, and somehow, have developed a really good friendship. When I was having relationship problems, he was the first person I would go to and vice versa. About 3 years ago, I went to DC to visit schools and we hung out a little...but it was kinda a disaster. At this point, I was in a relationship and was totally thrown off by my feeling an attraction to him. I was so nervous and felt so guilty and felt like I was cheating on my boyfriend, that I totally ruined the night and was like "take me home".

BUT, we still kept talking over gchat and such. And funny enough, the relationship even grew from there. We talked about politics, TV, music, life, pretty much everything else in between. There has always been this sort of understanding that we connect so well, but we were 1500/3000 miles apart so nothing could materialize from it. And like I said, both of us recognized this. So that continued for three years, until a month and a half ago.

So I (wisely or unwisely, whichever way you want to go with it) decided to stay with him while I was in DC for the conference. He picked me up from the airport, I dropped my stuff off and we went to dinner. I hate to sound so cliche, but the chemistry really was just crazy. There were no serious lulls in the conversation, it just was so natural. And I think that really says something provided that since that first year, we have only seen each other twice. But I mean, 6 years...you do get to know each other...But I digress. We both had a glass of wine, so we were kinda loosened up and it was just happening. So after we ate, we rented a movie and went back to his apartment to watch it. Then we talked for like 3 hours afterward and decided it was time to go to sleep. SUPER platonic.

So I was going to go to sleep on the couch but he was like, "You can sleep in my bed, it's big enough for the two of us". Mistake #1. So he told me he had to do this motivational call to a client at like 8:30 but he didnt want to wake me up (thoughtful huh) So I said OK. I tried to stay like on the edge of the bed the entire night. And he was a complete gentleman...he didn't touch me the entire night. Now the next morning...different story. He took the call and then he got back in the bed. Mistake #2. So we talked for about 30 minutes before he was like, "Do you want a massage". Mistake #3. It was the best massage I have ever had. Not a full body, but just from my waist to my neck. And let me say that I NEVER let people touch my neck...but I let him all up in there. lol. We then somehow started play fighting or whatever. Just joking around and having a really good time. It actually took a lot out of us, so we were just laying down for a while. And out of nowhere, he's like, "I'll be right back". So he comes back and throws the cover over both of us....and turns on this flashlight that he had just retrieved and is like, "I used to like to pretend under the covers like they were tents". lolol. Hilarious. And if you knew this dude, you'd know how big of a deal that was. It was literally like in that moment, I saw his wall just crumble and come down in front of me. Something so simple, but it really did mean a lot...kinda symbolic actually. We stayed under there for like 15 minutes just kinda laying side by side and looking at each other. And it was kinda funny, but I remember laying there and realizing, "I think we are holding hands". Once again, it seems like a really stupid thing to memorialize, but just the way everything just floooooowed....freaking amazing. Somehow, I ended uprubbing his palm and he was rubbing the top of mine. And that's a big deal for me, because I really dont like touching.

So we literally just laid for 15 minutes, just breathing, and being, and looking at each other. I woulda been content if we just left it at this. But no. So then...he says, "Would you be incredibly mad at me if I kissed you". All I remember is giggling and then his lips were engulfing mine, but in an oh so good way. It started really sweetly and innocently. Kinda like a "I can't believe we are kissing each other type thing". Then it just got like incredibly intense. We didn't have sex, both of our clothes remained on...but pleasure was HAD. On both of our parts. We just kissed and touched and rubbed and held each other for like 4 hours straight. Then we decided we should probably get up, but as we got up, we started kissing again...and somehow ended up on the floor for like a hour. Then, Aduli said he wanted to take a shower. So I said I'd watch him (lol so not like me). So I get in there and he starts running the bath water and went to go get his swim trunks and was like, "Will you get in with me, you can put these on". And so I did....Mistake # I lost count. lol. So we're in the tub, sitting across from each other (that was actually a pretty big tub). And somehow, we started kissing yet again...for like an hour AND he started to act like he wanted to pull an "Australia" on me, until I nipped that in the bud and we got out.

So we got out and the music was still playing and everything. So I'm drying off with the towel around me and he like gently pins me against the wall and we go at it AGAIN. That was the sexiest thing I have ever experienced in my life. Please believe if I wasn't concerned about my sanctity and purity, I would have taken him right there...but I couldnt give it all up at that point.

So the next day, he told me I forgot my charger at his apartment and that he was going to bring it to me. So he did. I came out of my hotel and saw him there...looking amazing. So he gives me my charger and I say thanks and buy and turn around to walk back to my room. So I'm walking back but I dont see his car pass me, so I turned around and here he comes running up to me. So all I got out was , "Really Aduli"? And he just smiles and tips my chin up and gives me like the most passionate kiss ever. EVER. Just all up in public with people all around and everything. It was outside in the crisp Maryland fall air. It was just beautiful. So I was like, "I can't believe you did that". And he said, "Well I couldn't wait another 3 years to do that again. I couldnt".

Like OMG. Mother freaker. So after I got back home, a week went by before EITHER of us discussed it. And we talked multiple times. But I broke down and was like, we need to talk about this, so we did. And I let him know how I felt and he let me know how he felt. He was like, he had never had as much fun with anyone as he had with me and he felt something and blah blah. So then like about a week later, he tells me that he's been having a hard time forgetting about what happened and where I fit into his life and should I and how I fit in with him dating other people and stuff. So I told him I pretty much felt the same way, but we just left it at that. And at one point, I think he tried to bring up the subject of visiting me, but I kinda ignored it because at THAT point, I still kinda had a boyfriend. Although last week, he said I should come spend New Years/his birthday with him...but I don't have any money, and I have to be back in Austin on the 3rd of January anyway. And we've had some conversations ABOUT the goings on of that weekend and what we enjoyed and what we didn't blah blah. I'm talking 8 hour conversations and carrying on. But then a couple of nights ago...it turned SERIOUS and that is all I am going to say. But oh my goodness...I am feeling this dude uncontrollably like no other. Why can't school just be done so I can move to Merraland!!!!!!!!! (and for those of ya'll who think I'm moving to MD because of him, please check my previous posts from like 3 years back where that has always been my goal...) 6 more months man! Maybe I'll visit him for my birthday...or he could visit me...

But the whole point of this long behind post was to describe the limbo and the reason for the limbo. It's a good place because it's exciting and inticing. But it's a bad place because it is nerve racking and I just wish I could call him and tell him to come over so I can touch him.

And I'm not oblivious, I know the situation. I'm not expecting him to stop dating people or going to the club every weekend. I know he's a serial dater. I know how he is. I'm not his girlfriend nor do I want to be at this point. I mean in June, who knows, but right now, I don't really want to get into an all encompassing relationship again. I just hope he was wait 6 months for me. Wouldn't that be about a bitch if he got into a relationship in the next 6 months, when he was NEVER had a relationship before?

Overwhelmed

This is a time for big changes right now...and I'm not even sure how to feel about it. Do I go back to California? Do I stay in Texas? Do I strike out on my own and move to the East Coast? Do I get back together with my boyfriend? Do I leave him for good? Do I try to make something more out of a friend? Do I leave it as is?

Just too many choices to make. Yes some are bigger than others, but they are all weighing on me and making me a miserable wreck right now. There isn't one day that goes by that I do not feel like crying because of these decisions. It is so overwhelming and I wish it would just stop.

I'm A Bleep Bleeping Psychic

What did I tell ya'll.... I said Imogen Heap's "Aha!" was going to be on SYTYCD and I said Wade Robson or Mia was going to do it....and who did? Wade. BAM. lol. That's just a song MADE for choreography.

So This Is What It Feels Like To Feel Again....

But then again, I do not know what I want. All I know is that from now until I graduate in May is a really long time. I can't expect him to stay single for 6 months...I can hope...but I can't really expect it. Although he has been single for 7 years so I don't really know...

The man that's stolen my heart
And beauty is his name
I'm hoping I can make you mine
'For another woman steals your heart
And once your beauty is mine
I swear we will never be apart

What the Hell Have I Done?

Sooooooo....it's been three weeks and apparently, that's all it took for reality to set in for me. This isn't going to happen. It just isn't. No matter how much I think about it, it's not going to happen. It COULD happened. It's not like its the circumstances, no no, it is because of the person.

Realistically. I know him. I know how he operates, I know how he functions. I know he isn't going to go for this/us. Yeah, he could go for me, but the fact that it isn't easy...he won't do it.

And I can already feel it. I let him in and know I am the one that is going to be hurt. But you know, you reap what you sow...and this is what I get.

I can dream and think about it as much as I want to, but it really isn't going to happen. Does it hurt....yes it does. A lot. And for the first time in the three weeks, I do actually feel like I am going to cry.

I don't know how I even let some ish like this happen to me. THIS is why I don't let go. And THIS is why I have not honored my feelings for 7 years. THIS right here.

And the worse thing... I would usually go to him for advice about this.....got damn. I have really fucked the shit up yo. So upset right now.

Why Family Guy is Awesome Part Deux

"...and you do that weird trembling thing...I have a copper deficiency!"

Once again, Family Guy is awesome. BTW copper deficiency can cause loss of muscle control.

"...drinking melted butter for a midnight snack."

Well that was one from The Cleveland Show....but still it fit.

One More Thought For Effing "Perspective"

Oh, I don't know what to do
I can't stop wanting you
Oh I'm in love, I'm in love with my best friend
It's tearing me apart, because he has my heart
Oh I'm in love, I'm in love with my best friend

I've been wanting you for many life times now
And I'm so afraid to tell you how I really feel
You have been there for me I was 13 and you were 14
Best friends for years, where do I go from here

Oh, Oh, I can't stop the way that I feel
Everytime I see you, I lose control
I just can't let it go, no
A kiss from you, ooh how does it feel, Oh I wonder
I'm so close to you, but I wanna get next to you,

Oh, I don't know what to do
I can't stop wanting you
Oh I'm in love, I'm in love with my best friend
It's tearing my apart because he has my heart
Oh, I'm in love, I'm in love with my best friend

When we're out together everybody smiles at us
Cause they think that you're my man, so I hold your hand
Like you're my man
I keep hoping that you'll notice me
And maybe one day you and I could be
Together more than just friends yeah

Oh, I can't hide the way that I feel
Everytime I see you I lose control
I can't let it go, no, no
Kissing you just won't be enough
I need all of you, I wish you wanted me
Like I want you, oh, yeah

Oh I don't know what to do
I can't stop wanting you
I'm in love, I'm in love with my best friend
It's tearing my apart, because he has my heart
I'm in love, I'm in love with my best friend

If you only could understand the things that he does for me,
Beautiful, wonderful, gorgeous and simplicity
He describes all the things that love is about for me

And I got to have him, yes I want him
I want him, I need him
I'm in love with my best friend
I'm in love, yeah

Oh, I don't know what to do
I can't stop wanting you
Oh, I'm in love I'm in love with my best friend
It's tearing me apart, because he has my heart
I'm in love I'm in love with my bestfriend

Perspective Is Now My Least Favorite Word...

I wish we didn't have to have perpective...
I wish I could shake you...
I wish I could tell you how I really feel...
I wish I didn't have to be strong...
I wish you knew what I wanted...
I wish we had more time...
I wish we weren't 1500 miles apart...
I wish we could be together...
I wish I didn't want you...
I wish I didn't want to talk about you...
I wish I didn't think about you...
I wish I didn't still feel you...
I wish you didn't make me feel music like you do...
I so wish we didn't have to have perspective...

I Know I'm Late But

This Sam Sparro character is kinda awesome. I enjoy "Black and Gold"...even sounding a little colored on there. Loving it.

I Am Seriously Done Tonight

"I hope that you're the one. If not, you are the prototype"

Wow

I don't like being cliche and saying silly things, but I think I have to say something. I have always felt music, but right now, I have never had an entire album speak to me like this...

"Love Behind the Melody" by Raheem DeVaughn

OMG. I've heard it before, when it first came out. But now, just extra wow with it. That is all.

So We're Ripping Off Imogen Heap Now?

I don't listen to the radio that much, but is anyone else particularly upset about this Jason Derulo character TOTALLY effing up Imogen Heap's "Hide and Seek"? He turned it into some stupid radio edit crap. Ew. I can't believe Imogen Heap allowed this.... like serious. Not happy with this.

I wonder if the "mmm whatcha say" part is really her, or if they used someone else.

Modern Family... Loving It

Baby baby I just wanna do you do you, do you wanna do me do me, underneath the moonlight, the moonlight tonight...Just so i can feel you feel you, maybe that would heal you heal you, from the inside...

That song is awesome. Sorry. Who comes up with some ish like that.

But other than the song, I like the chunky gay guy. He makes me laugh every episode.

Why Was There a Wyclef Impersonator on Dancing With the Stars?

That's all. I'm mad they had him have the long locks and ish too. That was just too much.

You Look Waffle House Handsome

WTF does that even mean. I don't know how to feel about the Cleveland show...

My Three Favorites Made His Band

I'm good. I can pick em... Jamereo, Brockett and Jaila all made his band...along with some others...I just wanted to put that out there that if this was on one of the fantasy things, I would have won. BAM!

I Gotta Revist This...Best Dave Chappelle Ever

"Spaghetti spaghetti, ripping it up, cutting it up... talking bout ugnh!"
"How you gonna rip it like this son, how you gonna rip it like that son"
"...all this pubic hair..."

I can't every say anything else. Where'd you go Dave?

So I've been debating with myself for many posts just who should hold the title of my favorite pianist. And you know, I am just not even going to try to call it. I have 4 that tie for my favorite and all for very different reasons.

1. Keiko Matsui: I've written so much about her I already know. But I am doing a serious study session, and I like putting on my pianists, which brought me to this post. This chick is beyond belief. I went to see her two summers ago and no lie, I was sitting there shaking with chills and almost cried. It was so amazingly beautiful. I still can't describe it. She literally takes you places you've never been, that you don't want to go, that you love, and places you do not expect to go. This lady is something nother else man. The way her music can make you FEEL is unlike any other.

And another cool thing about her, especially with her earlier albums, it is simply instrumental. Her latest Moyo and Walls of Akendora, were a bit more "produced", but none the less excellent. Going back to my point. She can create a mood with live instrumentation so well it is amazing. And then her band blends certain instruments so sometimes you feel like your on the beach and others you feel like you are lost in the forest. I've never heard a solo piano and saxaphone work together as best as Keiko Matsui and Paul Taylor have done it...simply amazing.

I think another thing that makes Keiko Matsui so special is that when she writes, it comes from somewhere deep within her. I'm not saying this is not the case with other pianists, but when you watch her live, you can just see the music eminating from her body. I'm telling you, it was quite unlike anything I have ever seen before in my life.



2. Philippe Saisse: Now this dude right here is one of the most slept upon jazz pianists ever. Like seriously. The thing that makes Philippe Saisse so special is her journey and versatility. On each album, you are going to get an entirely different style...and honestly, there is just one album, "Body and Soul Sessions" that I did not absolutly love.

With Philippe Saisse, he no doubtedly has a more produced sound on his records, but it is still wonderful. On one of the records, "Halfway Til Dawn", he had a sort of electronica/techno/jazz thing going and it was great. But I think what makes him great all around is his ability to ride a beat. While his music doesn't make me feel as emotional as Keiko Matsui's...it will make me stop and rewind and think, "Now how did this dude think to put that together".

Also, I've loved this dude since 8th grade, and I didn't even know it. So I have a particular infinity for him. It's his creativity that gets me.

3. Marcus Johnson: I've liked this dude for a while too. My dad bought his first CD, Chocolate City Groovin' and it just sat up in the cabinet until I really started to enjoy jazz. When I busted it open, I was surprised and happy. Now admittedly, I didn't pick back up on Marcus Johnson until about 2 years ago when I was introduced to Pandora.

Of the four, Marcus Johnson is the most rooted in R&B. He does a lot of covers, but he also has a lot of original pieces. I think the reason I like him is because his stuff is so funky, it just hurts. His music is also more culturally "relevant" and is actually kinda sexy. LOL. Gives you chills like Keiko but in a different kind of way. He's like the Maxwell of jazz.

Loving this dude.


4. Alex Bugnon: Now Alex Bugnon...he's very similar to Philippe Saisse, but very different all at the same time. I don't like to pin artists against each other, but I will say Alex Bugnon is Philippe Saisse minus the adventurous nature. But this doesn't mean I don't like him.

His songs make me feel good. OOOOh, he's like right in between Philippe Saisse and Marcus Johnson. Funky style, but not quite as funky as Marcus.

I think the reason these are my four favorite is because they all capture emotion wonderfully, and in very different ways. And btw... I'm mad at Marcus Johnson still. I've seen the other three in concert...but never him...and when I was about to have the chance, he wanted to act up and go to NY, but that is neither here nor there.

Reflections Again

So sometimes I get really, really nostalgic about times, particularly my first year of college in Maryland. I'm not sure why I am today (actually yes I do, it's because I'm listening to Marcus Johnson- who always makes me think of DC area). So I was thinking about how awesome that year was.

Yes I was slightly homesick, but that was seriously the best year of my life that I can remember. Now I'm not saying that I've had bad years or anything, but this year was so awesome, I cannot even explain properly.

I had the awesomest roommate ever. She didn't talk and she was gone from Thursday night to Monday morning every week. So it was basically like I had the room to myself. I remember coming home late at night and opening my window and the breeze would just blow in. Then I would put on some Philippe Saisse and just let it put me to bed...

Just such good times man. And what's really funny, it was the first, and honestly the only time in my life where I have been social. lol. In high school, for the rest of my college years at Cal, and pretty much in law school, I've been kinda a loner. But it is a loner by choice. I have no idea why, I just enjoy being by myself more.

And I was an explorer...loved that. I would just jump on the metro and go to DC or VA like it was nothing. I guess I was just exposed to so many things and I kinda miss that. It was just somehting in the air, in the breeze that could make you happy.

She Wolf?

Is it just me, or does Shakira sound a little bit like a terrible Imogen Heap on "She Wolf". I'm just saying... they slight yodeling thing on the song reminds me of her but it's still terrible Shakira. lol.

Dancing with the Stars 09/22

Donny Osmond was kinda awesome doing that salsa. His faces were priceless. I enjoyed an immense amount. Lol. I'm scared for Macy Gracy tonight.

Im Jealous

...of anyone who actually gets to experience Fall. It turns fall on the 22nd, but being in Texas, I really would have no earthly idea. I'm jealous of anyone who gets to wear long sleeves right now and gets to feel crisp air (I don't know if Texas is even allowed to have crisp air...it always has a bit of moisture in it, even in the dead of winter).

Also, when I was young, I always used to love Halloween. Like love love love. One of my favorite holidays. I liked decorating and going out to Alameda (disclaimer: i would spend the night at my friends house because it was her b'day the next day... I wasnt one of those people who would just park on the street and trick or treat in a neighborhood that wasnt mine! lol) and trick or treating. Such a crisp breeze in the air cuz your right off the water and everything.

50 Cent... Puffy Who?

50 cent is "dat dude". I so appreciate this dude. Wanna call him a sell out, do what you want. But he is a smart man. Love him.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-JifYkKAH0

I'm Homesick Yet Again

That's all...

Nigerians Boycotting District 9...hmmm I wonder why...

I'm not Nigerian or anything but I understand why they are protesting District 9. That movie made them look like criminals, thugs, schysters, canibals, and they were having interspecies relations. I would not have enjoyed if I were them. My question, is why weren't the aliens having relations with the white South Africans? Hmmm. Were they too pure for that?

My Take on trick-ass Kanye

You know, people might think I am late on this, but whatever it is fine. I want to talk about this Kanye-Taylor Swift thing.

Now, I admit, I am always the first to call some racial motivation to something, but for some reason, I just cannot see it here. Maybe because I've never liked Kanye's ole punk ass since he first came out, I'm happy that someone FINALLY reacted to something bad that he did. He's an rude, short, ugly, egotistical, self-centered lil bitch in my book. He always was and he always will be.

I will say that we don't know how the world would have acted had he done this to a little black teenager, but he didn't. He did it to a white girl. Maybe white people are reacting because of the ingrained, "you don't mess with our lily white girls or we'll eff you up" mentality from the slave times. Or could they really just be reacting because he's an asshole?

Now this whole thing about him being a racist...I don't think he is a racist. Come on, he likes white people because they mix with black people and produce mutts, his favorite type of video whore(I know ya'll remember that quote). I think for someone who is such an idiot, he is race conscious and knows about race relations in that nature. Just because he said Bush hates black people...sheeeeeit from the coverage of Katrina to what went down in Katrina, any non-American watching could see that was clearly motivated by race and was not a product of black folks imaginations. And Kanye calling out white girl wasn't racist. It was dumb and rude and uncouth as hell, but it wasn't racist.

But anyone calling Kanye anything I've called him or worse (sans tigger with an n or a racist) is completly justified because his fool like behavior that night (what kind of 32 year old walks around a video music award with an open bottle of liquor, skinny jeans that fall at his butt, and a sleazy looking chick on his arm)...

Rant over

Best Quote Ever

"How small of you"- Nene Leakes from Real Houswives of Atlanta.

I like to add some variation to it. Sometimes, it can be used as an insult, while other times, it can be used as an observational phrase. All you have to do is insert your choice adjective in where "small" is and there you go.

For instance, if someone says, "I'm going to put on some trousers", you can say, "How British of you". You can go where ever you would like with it. Its such a verstile phrase.

Shows They Need To Bring Back

1. Supermarket Sweep- that show was overall bomb. I used to play Supermarket Sweep in the store with my mom...it was her way of getting the shopping done faster and it was fun for me. Everyone wins.
2. Anything with the Wayans Brothers- I'm talking the main siblings...not children of siblings.
3. Sailor Moon- OMGGGGGGG, I used to watch that show at 3:30 after schoool in middle school. it was the highlight of my day man.
4. Bug Juice- well maybe they shouldnt bring it back...cuz they'll still use 14 year olds and I won't care anymore.

Getting My Erudition On

That is all... I just really like that phrase.

Don't Be Tardy For The Party

The End.

Ellipse

So is it just me or does it seem like Imogen Heap wrote the song, "Aha" on the new Ellipse album just for Mia Michaels or Wade Robson? So sounds like a song they could do a bomb dance to. Just them though could pull it off. It reminds of something that woulda been on "The Nightmare Before Christmas" or "Ahhhhhh! Real Monsters". Awesome.

And let me just take another moment to say how awesome Imogen Heap is... the new album is freaking bomb. It starts out kinda slow for me because I don't really like the slow ballad like songs from her, I need something with a beat behind it and then plus her odd voice. I guess that means I like the "trip-hopdom" style from here. AWE SOME.

"The Fire" was also great. So enjoy the solo piano for the entire song. Canvas is good too. My recommendations:

Swoon
Tidal
Bad Body Double
Aha!
The Fire
Canvas

Conclusion: this chick is beyond great.

The Coldest Rejection Ever

Yeah... That dude Jason "J. Free" on Making His Band really should feel like an ass. When you are rejecting someones advances, all you have to say is, "Im not interested" or "nothing can happen betwixt us". No no...not this dude. He proceeded to tell ole girl that he doesnt want to be with her for 10 minutes and in about 5 different ways. She kept telling him, OK, but he keeeept going.

That was one of the dirtiest things I have ever seen. I wanted to come through the screen and give the girl a pat on the back. Its OK Lynette...that was an assholic move on his part...although he was possibly drunk when he did it.

Guess What, It is MAURY Povich, not MURRY

That is all...no actually it is not. I need to know why people still insist on calling that dude Murry. How do you look at Maury and get Murry? I'm just curious. Can you not read?

Hyperizing

This video is super awesome. I'm sorry. It simply is. Im also very angry this is a DJ Quik production. And you could tell too with that little bell at the end of every line. lol. Greatness.

King Curtis

This is the best WifeSwap EVER!!!!! Yes King Curtis. He needs his behind BEAT man!




My favorite phrases:

"...she be's sarcastic"

"...little high heels"

"i'll tell you something, bacon is good for me"

"im on team fun"

Eric Darius is Amazing

I forgot to mention it, but Eric Darius absolutly killed it at the Long Beach Jazz Festival. Everyone else (sans Norman Brown) was terrible in my honest opinion. But oh, Eric Darius is freaking amazing. Not to mention that he's hot. Just throwing that out there. His live version of "Just Like That" gave me chills. It was great. I so would go pay to see him again. And ya'll know I do not say that often.

Wait...Actual Coloreds?

Yesterday I wrote a little something about my love for the The Practice. I could only think that I liked it because it was realistic. But I really like it because they have black lawyers who act like black people! Love it. Rebecca and Eugene get it!

Adult Garanimals

I think they should make adult garanimals, especially for men. Just mix and match ish up...no?

Battle of the Legal Dramas/Dramadies

So basically, I've been watching pretty much all the legal drama's of lore and present and they make me giggle. I think by FAR, THe Practice is the most realistic of legal dramas out there. This show is super awesome. Can't stand Berluti though.

Then we have the Boston Legals...I love the show, but its not that realistic. No one wins that much and what kinda firm takes on cases like that?

Raising the Bar...hmmm, this is decent, but I cannot deal with the dialouge. It is so forced. I love Jane Kazmarek though.

Law & Order...come now. Need I say more. Too much unfair suprise to be real.

Drop Dead Diva...awesome show, terrible legal show. It's like please. That chick woulda been disbarred.

Also, sort of unrelated...someone please tell me what the deal is with Jami Floyd. I do not like her one bit. Now Ron Kuby...that's the dude.

Plastic Surgery Changes Your Race

Is it just me or is Faye Dunaway starting to look like a light-skinned black woman? Or at the very least a creole lady. I love how when people get so much plastic surgery they start changing races and ish.

This "Drake" character will always be Jimmy, or "Wheelchair Jimmy" to some. Yes he is all big now as Drake, but he shall always be, Jimmy from DeGrassi man. I don't care what anyone says.

Don't Be Corny On Your Instrument

Por lo tanto, Cuanto lo siento, pero la banda ha Haciendo Su despertar el amante de la música en mí de nuevo. Me gusta cómo me van a través de chorros de que es mi instrumento favorito. Lo que solía ser la saxaphone, entonces es el piano, luego fue la guitarra. Me he cambiado de nuevo ... ahora ... es el bajo.

Siempre he apreciado el bajo como siempre suele escribir sobre caliente, y los sonidos. Pero debido a los bajos por lo general es un instrumento de fondo, es obtener un lote doesnt del reconocimiento o de jugar. Wayman Tisdale desempeñado conducir bajo, pero ahora se ha ido por lo que no creo hay alguien que juega incluso conducir bajo.

Larga historia corta. Reproducción de los graves es sexy como el infierno. Lo siento que es. Es un instrumento caliente. Y si bien no voy a decir que el bajo es más caliente que la guitarra, le diré que creo que tenemos que respetar un poco más.

Making His Band...Best Thing to Hit MTV in Years

OK, Puffy just got an extra 5 points from me...so that puts him at a -45. lol. This Making His Band so far is absolutly bomb. Sorry it just is. And you know what's really sad, a lot of people (the MTV generation) probably dont like it...

Here's my thing, there were so many talented ARTISTS on there, not just singers. And they seemed like regular people. Not attention starved whores (whores is used for men and women in this case). Not just talentless people who gyrate on the floor and call that crap ass ish dancing. lol.

My favorites are....

- Jaila (vocals): this "chick" is crazy man. Crazy...she embarassed all those singers. She tore it up beyond belief man. And she was killing that outfit man lol. But serious, she was so awesome it wasn't even funny. And it just goes to show, if you have talent, it doesn't even matter what you do in your personal life, people will recognize your talent and respect you for it.

- Jamereo (bass): this kid (yes he's a kid, he's only 19) has some serious talent. After he is done with Puffy's tour (if Puffy doesnt pick him he has lost his damn mind and those 5 points alloted to him will be taken away) he really needs to go into the jazz scene. He would get so much musical play in the jazz circuit its not even funny. Not many people can do it, but his style is almost a slap bass style...kinda like Louis Johnson from the Brothers Johnson. So enjoyed him.

- Brockett (keyboard): yes, this dude is wierd, but he is a savant on the boards man. So love this dude too, he looks like he may be a little crazy though. Just saying. But his musicality is really good though.

- And those two white guitarists whose names I cannot remember...i enjoyed as well.

All I know is the show "bet not" be effed up by some old petty drama or imma be mad. Don't eff this gem up for ratings MTV. Do not do it.

Why I Love My Boyfriend v.4

4. His natural smell is so yummy. I could smell his neck for ever.

3. I've said it before, but I'm saying it again. He tries so hard to make me happy and the fact that he tries so hard makes me feel so special.

2. He has stuck by me for the past 2 years. We only get to see each other 5 times at most during they year because I'm in TX and he's in CA. But he sticks by me and is always there for support.

1. He said my new "roll" was cute.

sadness abounds

Say what you want to about Michael Jackson but he was a legend. There will never be another one like him. There just won't.

If You Arent Familiar With The Table Flip You Probably Arent From New Jersey

Best line ever.

SYTYCD Intro

I'm sorry, but the introduction where they all dance in to their names is sooooooo rediculous. It makes me want to vomit each time I see it, mainly because they all do the same thing each time. Vom everywhere.

Oh yeah and Lil C. is hot. Sorry, he simply is.

The Sims 3

So yes, this game is freaking awesome, but I do have some qualms...

1. The game is so good and chocked full of stuff that it can't fast-forward and it makes my computer super slow with it. I figured out how to rectify the first one; basically, you have to change the screen resolution to the lowest possible and it fast forwards a little faster.

As for making my computer run slower, that is a serious problem and I am probably going to have to take it off my computer when school starts.

2. I still cannot figure out how to get sims to marry each other. I can get them to have babies and love each other and co-habitate and everything, but I cannot get a "married" option to come up. What is that about? It kinda hurts my feelings. lol. Illegitamate children and everything. LOL.

3. Also, there is a lot more hidden things in this game which could be seen as a negative and a plus, which ever way you want to look at it. It took me forver to find out how to catch a deathfish...forever, but I guess somepeople like finding the puzzles...me, not so much.

There are a lot of good things though. First, you can have extremely different looking Sims. In previous versions, they kinda all looked the same. I also like the seamlessness of it.

Apparently, the goods outweigh the bads because I still play it every day. lol.

- So when I get tired of the people, then I am going to figure out the architecture and stuff. Yeah!

Magic v. Lakers Game 2

I know that basketball games are a team effort...or at least thats what we are supposed to say. But real talk, Courtney Lee and JJ Redick kinda lost that game for the Magic. Yes, they should have been up more and played more aggressively at the end, but those last couple of plays those two made were a mess.

But did anyone see my boy Hedo with the Kobe back block? That ish was awesome son. Awesome.

WTF iTunes?

So there are some songs that cost $1.29 and $1.49 now as opposed to the regular $.99. Not happy iTunes. It doesn't seem like that was the best business move to make man. Fifty cents doesn't seem like its a big difference, but it is. It sure did just prevent me from buying a song. And note, I am not saying I am going to do it, but don't be surprised if you see a raise in piracy again. NOT SMART man....

The New Job

So, on the second day of my summer clerkship, I am totally "digging" it. Let's see how I feel about it at the end of 6 weeks. No one made me mad yet, so of course I like it lol.

But in all seriousness. I can TELL that this is the kind of firm that I want to work at permanently. They have a very VERY laid back atmosphere. Meaning there isn't anyone always looking over your GD shoulder and ish. Plus they have a casual dress code, which is awesome. You don't have to come in a suit and stockings in the summer! You know that is freaking awesome. You just have to dress up if you are meeting with a client or during trial, but thats a given.

And they actually give us work. Yes, it is document reviews and memos, but it is interesting. Totally enjoyable.

They also are soo nice. And I know that part of it is the whole "wooing" the summer associate thing, but the attorney's I'm in contact with all genuinely seem like the get along and are easy to get along with. And that is something coming from me, cuz I don't like a whole lot of people. No I'm kidding, only slightly though.

But yes, this is the kind of environment that I would like to work in. First, it is a plaintiff's firm so they aren't fighting for corrupt ass people which is lovely. Second, they are midsized, so there are only about 20 attorney's in the office I am in, and like 30 medical people/legal support staff. And they don't have the whole stuffy law firm crappy feel. Its hot.

Oh yeah, and I get paid son!

Hedo Turkgalu...Yay or Nay

He is definitely a YAY! This guy is like the new Vlade Divac. Yes, they are from different countries, and they play different positions, but that's fine. He's my new Vlade just because I love his name. PLUS, the dude can shoot. He be making shots that don't even look like they should go in. Loving this dude.

Dhani Jones...Yay or Nay

I cannot decide if I like this Dhani Jones. Some days I feel like I do, some days I feel like I don't. I enjoy the Travel Channel show. He's getting out and traveling and stuff and he seems to be a good representation of the black race. But then, there's that Fredrick Douglass pulled back hair. Yes yes, its original and its not dirty locks like these others...but I just don't know about it.

SYTYCD 05/21

I'm sorry that those two guys dancing latin together were actually getting it. It was wierd together, but then by themselves, they were getting it. HA!

There Are NO Words...

...to describe just what my mommy means to me. There just aren't. We've spent the last two weeks together and even though I knew I missed her, I didn't quite know the level. My mom has always been my very best friend and only seeing her duri school breaks has been really hard for me. Anyway, so I surprised her on her birthday and came home in between my finals and got to spend her birthday, mothers day at home with her then we went back to texas for my cousins graduation. Then we took a road trip down to finish my final then to visit another cousin in Houston and back up to Dallas today. Point being I've had such a good time with my mm and I'm going to miss her when she goes back to CA in a couple of days. My parents can move down here right?

Yuck

It irritates me when people say "after the jump" in reference to a second page of a blog. That is all

at a certain age a girl needs to wear a brar

Jill Zarin from Real Housewives of New York puts extra r's on things. It is great.

Thanks Damages!

I looooove finding music from TV shows. It is the greatness. So my newest song is "Ceylon" by Madita. It is some good stuff. I don't do well with music classification, so bear with me. I feel like it is kinda like electronica/trip hop, but I don't know. Kinda reminds me of my girl Imogen Heap.

I also found that I for some reason looove ignoring TV shows when they are popular and stocking up on back episodes so I can watch them all in one sitting. Did that with Boston Legal and the OC and now I'm doing it with Damages. I love this show. Glenn Close is one of those people who they are absolutly hideous until they smile. What is that about.

can you be in both Arlen,TX and Brooklyn, NY at the same time?

Why yes it is. Does anyone beside me think that that Van Kampen dude from The Real Housewives of New York looks a whole lot like Hank Hill? Just gonna throw that put there.

Thanks J-Lo (there is sarcasm there)

OK seriously, this whole new big behind thing is getting to be a little too much. It's really quite annoying actually. Actually, I think what's annoying about it is WHO they are targeting with it. Yes, this is old, but for some reason, it is really, truely effecting me now. I am soooo sick of people being amazed that white/Armenian/Asian who the eff ever has a little bit of azz. It is soooo annoying to me.

I do not want to name any names or anything, but there is one which out there whose behind literally looks like she has a diaper on when she wears anything other than dresses. It is past and beyond disgusting.

No, actually, I know what happened to make me so upset. There was this picture of Zoe Saldana and someone was like, "She's cute she is just to skinny. She ain't got no azz". But wait a minute now. Zoe Saldana is like 5'7 and probably in the 120s-130s and she has a toned, worked out figure. WTF. She is not flat-behinded at all. WTF?

I really do need to know why it is now all of a sudden "cool" to be out of shape? I mean honestly. This is not saying that you cannot be in shape and have behind, sheeet, look at most track athletes, gymnasts the Williams sisters. But that kind of behind is straight MUSCLE, it isn't fat and weirdly shaped. But what I am saying, is when did it become cute to look like your ass is deformed. I need to know that. And when did it become cute not to like in shape women?

Yes, black men have always liked big butts over the chest area. That is a given. But I mean, I think it obsession getting really ridiculous. Maybe it is the track runner that will always be in me, but that shit is not sexy. Not in the least.

Whore Pit Vipers!!!!

I have never like Melissa Rivers, however her meltdown on Celebrity Apprentice was great. She called Annie Duke and some ex porn star, whore pit vipers. lol. Imma start using that one.

The Amazing Race

I strongly dislike Margie and Luke...they disgust me. Just because you are hearing impaired/deaf doesnt mean that you can treat people however you want and not expect for someone to say something. And I say this having #1 a best friend who is deaf and my sister is hearing impaired and I know neither of them use their disability like this dude Luke and his Mom are. That dude DID forearm the black chick and what, because he's deaf she's not supposed to do anything. Get that crap outta here.

And of course, the black women get portrayed as the bitches of the group. They just don't play, thats all.

Big Red Gum Burned My Tongue!!!!!!

OMG son! I got a burn on my tongue from eating Big Red. WTF. I took a nap and had some big red tucked on the side of my tongue and then I woke up. I was fine for the rest of the day, but then this morning. The side of my tongue is swollen and it hurts like a bit my tongue AND scalded it.

It took me forever to think of what could have done this, and then i said, maybe it was the gum. So I looked it up on google, and I saw 2 accounts of this. One that happened yesterday! So, the semi-lawyer in me says class action law suit against Wrigley's man. That ish is not normal!

Update: on Monday, my tongue had swollen up on the side and it had blisters on it. It even hurt to talk. But today, it is just slightly hurting. I ate a lot of ice cream yesterday so that helped. Class...Action..son.

Who Has The Best Falsetto?

1. Felton Pilate- Confunkshun
2. Phillip Bailey- Earth Wind & Fire
3. El DeBarge

A Bunch of Randomness Mixed Up With Nothing

First: Darn the UT library...they offer most popular TV shows/movies that have a lawyer in them for free. Last semester, I got addicted to Boston Legal. Took a CD home per day and watched...it was great. This semester, I must admit, I am now addicted to The O.C. Yes I am slightly embarrassed about it, but it's OK. That show is bizzom. Even though the lawyer is the dad and it has nothing even remotely legal about it except the sprinkling of attorney-client privalege here and there, it is a great show. The main character, Ryan is a little too brooding for me. In fact, he reminds me Harry Potter...got transported to this new place made new friends and has this, "Im not a teenager and I do what I want" type of attitude. And the faces he makes, I can't look at the screen when he's on. But I LOOOOOOVE Sandy and Seth Cohen. They are the only reason I watch the show. Oh and Julie Cooper, she is who I aspire to be when I grow up, except I'm not white, a gold-digger, devious, or a whore so I don't know how that will work.

Maybe I like the O.C. because it reminds me of home. Am I from the O.C? No, I'm from Oakland. LOL. But my boyfriend is from Southern California near the beach, and in the past two years, I have gone to SoCal just as much as NoCal, so it is starting to kinda feel like home too.

2nd: Imogen Heap/Frou Frou. I've written a little bit about her before, but I chose to expound. This woman is insanely talented. Like seriously. Her voice is crazy, but it is awesome. I think the first song I heard from her, was in Shrek 2...well actually it was Frou-Frou...Holding Out For A Hero. I just thought the song was cool, but eh, not much. Then a couple of years later, I heard "Let Go", once again by Frou Frou on SYTYCD and fell in love with this chick. She captures emotion so well...her voice is has natural emotive qualities. You can tell when some people put fake emotion into songs, but she doesn't. And then mix that with the airey quality of the instruments they use...omg. It will give you chill bumps on a 100 degree day. No lie. Cuz there's beauty in the breakdown.

If I wasn't immediately convinced by this time, which I was, a couple of seasons on SYTYCD, Mia Michaels didthis CRAZY piece go "The Moment I Said It". It was crazy. I just sat there breathless for like a minute and kept watching it again. Then I went out and bought "Speak for Yourself" and every time I need something light and airey, that's where I go. She is beyond words...and proves that good music transcends genre. If you have an appreciation for music, you can and will find it everywhere.

3rd: Confunkshun. Now with them, I am convinced I was born two decades too late. OMG, I probably would have been the biggest groupie to them. I remember my parents used to play their old records and stuff and I had a couple of favorites, but I never really listened to them until I got imeem, and some good ones came out the wood works. "Let Me Put Love on Your Mind"...really though. This song is effing bomb. You just feel it man. Where are people like this now. They were straight killing it. Had choreography and live instruments and still killed it 68 times harder than these ridiculous fools out there today.

4th: I'm spending the first 7 weeks of my summer in Dallas. I'm getting paid so I cannot complain, but it is going to be crazy hot and I am staying with my cousin whose daughter and I do NOT get along, and she just graduated from college, so she is staying at home. It is going to be interesting. But I figure I will be able to spend more time at the office and the social events because I won't want to go back, so they will be forced to hire me. :).

5th: Because I am spending 7 weeks in Dallas, that means I do not get to go home until July 10th. Please believe I will be out my last day. I haven't been home since spring break... that makes me sad. My mom is coming the third week of May and we are going to my cousins graduation in Oklahoma, but its not like going home to California. I need some In n Out and some Chinese food that doesn't taste like Mexican food or PF Chang's (sorry to tell ya'll, but PF Chang's is not genuine Chinese).

Which brings me to a thought I had last year. This firm I am working for this summer is a medium sized plaintiff's firm with offices in Dallas, Las Angeles, San Francisco, and Baltimore...all places I can live. I am going to try my hardest to get in with some people who can give me contacts with the LA and SF offices, because I really NEED to be in California to function properly as a human being. I know it sounds weird, but the culture is so different, and I have just not caught onto this Texas culture. I want to go back home. Sometimes you need to get away from home to remember what you've got. And I've done just that. Back to home please.

And with that, I think I really want to be in Southern California. I love it down there, not the party scene because that's not me, but the beaches. Loooove it. When I was stressed at home, I would hop on the BART and go into SF and walk along the "beach" to the GG bridge and back. Or I would get in my car and get on the 80 and drive along the side road thats right near the bay. It's just relaxing. In Austin, I walk along Town Lake (sorry, I refuse to call it Lady Bird Lake) every weekend because it mellows me out. Point being, I need to be near water to survive, and being in a landlocked city, kinda effs that up.

That brings me to my last statement. After these 3 finals, I will be a 3L. OMG OMG OMG. It is almost over. At this time next year, not only will I be studying, I will be packing up my apartment, and planning my move back to California, and planning my BAR study rituals and stuff. It's just crazy. The real, REAL life is about to start in a year guys. It's kinda scary. But I am looking forward to it, because I know I have prepared myself in law school and I will be OK no matter what happens.

-- Yes, this whole post as me procrastinating. I don't want to study any more.

Oh Shoot Philippe

So why am I just finding out that Philippe Saisse's "Young Nation" is a cover of an Aaliyah song? And he does kill it. Want to hear it? OK!

Aaliyah-Young Nation

Philippe Saisse- Young Nation

And yes, I am "re-finding" Philippe after I put him down when he did that horrible performance I saw in San Francisco. But this dude is really talented. You want to talk about multi-layered master piece? Go back and listen to....my favorite song from him. I can listen to this one on repeat for hours.

Halfway Til Dawn

Oh Shizzy Son!

So two of my very favorite artists/rgroups came out with new records on March 10, 2009: Philippe Saisse and The Rippingtons. And they are both effing bomb.

I will say this, neither album particularly sounds like anything that they usually do, but they are still very good, quality songs. It bothers me to no end when people say, "This is so not their style". WTF? Do you think people are supposed to stay static in their lives, opinions, habits, likes and dislikes? The obvious answer to this question is NO. So why would you expect an artist to stay static in a style?

1st, Philippe Saisse. People are saying that this album is not like his last two albums and thank goodness that is true. I personally thought his last two albums were garbage, but I bought them because I am a die hard fan. This new album, At World's Edge takes me back to Next Voyage on some songs and to Halfway Til Dawn on other songs. It is just freaking bomb. He is definatley one of the best producers out there. You want to talk about hearing layers in your music???? OMG. Just listen to Topanga Moon Dance, that song gets it on so many levels.

Oh yeah, I let me revise a comment I made in a previous post. I went to go see Philippe Saisse in September of 2006 and I was soooo disappointed. So much so that I renounced his title of best pianist and gave it to Keiko Matsui. Now, I do not want to take anything away from Keiko, so I will give them both NEW titles. Keiko will get the title for best structural pianist. Meaning that I like her mechanics and the emotion she can convey through her music, especially when playing live. Keiko will make you want to cry because he music is unbelieably beautiful and touches something deep inside you. Now Philippe will get the best funk/soul/jazz pianist. The way he just rides the beats is freaking amazing. He is always in the pocket. I just love his style beyond words.

2nd, The Rippingtons. Just going to throw this out there, but with this album, The Rippingtons should be called Jeff Kashiwa and the Rippingtons, not so much Russ Freeman, but it is still great. He is killing it on alto and soprano sax on these songs. So enjoying it. A lot of people who have reviewed the album seem to be upset because it is more of a smooth jazz album with fewer percussion. Well, let's look at the title guys. It's called Modern Art. Key word, Modern. Once again, they are switching up. If you listened to the album and was told it was som unknown band, you would like it. But just because it is not what you are used to from the Rippington's doesnt mean that you automatically have to dislike it.

Punch You In The Jeans

...best believe this ain't a metaphor...

From the people who wrote, "Dick in a Box"... I bring you...Punch You In The Jeans...



"when i punch your jeans I like to imagine a face. the fly is the nose and the balls are the base of the face"

"I gotta vendetta, it's against ya jeans"

"i'm gonna bruise dat denim, it really doesn't matter as long as you're in em"

"man i'll murder your jeans"

"cause of death? hecka punches"

"put divits in the rivits causing physical harm"

"

Best Picture Michelle Obama Has EVER Taken...

The only thing that can be said about this picture is....B.O.M.B. Seriously, she is bomb is this photo. Boss. Anyone who has something negative to say has lost it. She doesn't look homely here now does she. You wanna talk about her arms, you're just mad that she looks good and you are chunky (yeah I'm sensitve on the subject because I get the same criticism). And that dress...I usually dont wear sleeveless clothes because of the same backlash she is getting, but I would rock that. For $3,100 it should be getting it.

The Bachelor pulled a Real Chance at Love

Um, so I cannot figure out why people are so mad at "The Bachelor"...like seriously. We KNOW this ish is fake. I mean seriously. Even the realist of reality shows (The Real World) is now partly scripted. We know whats up. I don't even like the Bachelor but I wanted to know what the big hubub was about... yeah the Bachelor just knew the ratings were slipping and ish and took the VH1 reality route. Let us be real with life. lol.

So right now I'm on this jazz guitar kick. Not because I think it is the best instrument ever because the piano is. I think it is because it reminds me of home so much. When I say home I mean california. There is something about a guitar that reminds me of the pacific ocean and beaches and piers and stuff. I don't know what it is. But when I want to think of home all I need to do is out on some Nils or some Rippingtons and it is over. I just think of either being at Huntington Beach or driving on the access road next to 80. It is awesome. So excitable to go home in three weeks. It is just so soothing to be around water and listening to some guitar based jazz. I think that's why I go to Town lake so much. Its not the same but it has to suffice. I miss you california!

I Love Me Some Dancing Asian Dudes

Sorry, I have to say it again. And when I say it, I mean absolutly no disrespect. Dancing Asian guys are hot to me, point blank. It doesnt matter...Chinese, Japanese, Philipino, Vietnamese, whatever man...its hot when they can dance.

But yes, this is like the SYTYCD supercrew of this style of dance. Quest Crew. My favorites Dom, Hok, and Ryan are in the group...loving em. But they arent even the best. Love that little dude that be flipping everwhere. Just hawt.

Enjoy their best performance like EVER...

The Workplace

So I figured it out man...I have issue with "authority" in general, but I have seriously issue with "faux authority". So there's this chick at my intership who JUST graduated college and she be trying to exued authority and ish. Like Imma need you not to be talking down to people. Don't act like I will not put you in place. Because I will, and did today.

But yes, why did this chick ask this intern to get her a Dr. Pepper out of the fridge. She was like 5 feet away. WTF. Who the hell do you think you are. I need to know. You are not special and I need you to understand and recognize that. So today she come calling herself trying to correct me on something she knew nothing about. Naw son, back up on off. I had to lay it down (politly of course).

And that's another thing, when you have internships or summer jobs, you can't lay it down like a permanent job because they big big big bosses are watching you and asking others how you are. You can't totally let people know, don't eff with me, you gotta be more political. I cannot wait until I can lay it down for real at a perm job. Let these eem effers know. I look nice and innocent and unassuming, but I will tear your ass out if you eff with me.

Vent over.

Address to Congress...

Was HI-larious. OMG. Nancy Pelosi kept shooting up like someone shot her and/or bit her in the behind. Then Joe Biden looked like he was reading his blackberry or something, like why do these effers keep standing up. I'm tired of it. Then ole McCain looking like..."this was mine".

Freaking great. Almost better than the debates. Just saying!

Classic Guy

I remember this kind of music from back in the day...granted I was like 3 or 4, but I used to get it. My sister is 8 years older than me so she thought it was funny to teach me these dances. I can remember me her and my mom dancing to the acts on apollo and stuff... what happened man. Where is this goodness? It can come back and it would be so welcome.

This is Round and Round by Guy.

The Wonderfulness that is the Rippingtons

I am an outspoken fan of The Rippingtons. I have only been a fan for about a year now (I found them on Pandora... thank you Pandora). I mean I had heard of them before, but I really only heard the stuff they play on the radio (and we all know the mainstream stuff is never edgy like it should be).

Anyway, I know I have other articles on here about them, but I have to... sorry. I mean, seriously, Russ Freeman can cut up with a guitar man. He be killing it man. So mad at myself I didn't see them this summer...but I went to go see Keiko Matsui the week earlier so I should calm myself.

Their music is just so complex. I like many other people hear music in layers. I can go through one song just concentrating on the bass, or the piano, or the guitar. Point being is that there are so many different instruments with the Rippingtons and so many melody and rhythme changes... you will never be bored. Then when they added Jeff Kashiwa...man.

I also think it is so funny how a lot of their CD's were made in the 80's (Moonlighting was made in 1987 when I was 3), but they still sound fresh today. I am sure in the 90's people might have been tired of that type of music, but it is almost like it is making its comeback.Cannot wait until the new CD comes out in March. Hopefully they will come to the Bay Area this summer again. I would appreciate that.

BTW...Russ Freeman absolutly kills the end of Cicada from about 4:38 on. That is artistry man. Beautiful.

Jesse Powell

Yo, whatever happened to Jesse Powell? That guy was freaking bomb and he was cute. I wonder why he didn't do better than he did? His voice was velvet silky man. You want to talk about some range? He was the type of singer who at times you couldnt tell if it was a guy or a girl. That is some range. And he could sing an entire song in what some would consider falsetto... but it really wasnt even for him.

Neyo...you need to take some notes. You too bitch ass Chris Brown (yeah i usually don't cuss, but I felt this was more than appropriate).

Interesting Week

This has been a very interesting week...

I got the WORST grade I have gotten in my entire 25 years of living...and surprisingly I didn't cry.

I found 3 law school classes that do not send me running to gchat ever three minutes.

I am going to LA tomorrow to visit my boyfriend and bestest friend...

I turned 25... I am oooold son!

I got the birthday song serenaded to me... by someone who is NOT my boyfriend (ho din)

I started my internship as a TX House staffer... now I am not going to tell you who I'm working for... but he is awesome. And the rest of the staff is awesome...AND I get free lunch and dinner. Please tell me that is not awesome behavior!

Air and Simple Gifts

Man... I can't believe I forgot to elaborate. This was the perfect song for this moment. The song is broken up into three distinct parts. First, there is a sad almost solemn part...which to me symbolizes the distant past of America and everything as a people we have gone through.Then in the middle, it is a picks up and has a happy peppy feeling which symbolizes a change. Obama is that change. Hopeful change. Just a lot of symbolism there. It is what I would like to call a "Fruition Song".

Also, I loved that they played it right before Obama took the oath. Right in the middle, the "Obama is officially president" thing popped up on the...just overall beautiful. There was no point in this whole election race that moved me so that I had to force back tears.... But then again, what do you expect, It was composed by John Williams who has composed some of my favorite movie scores (Home Alone and Harry Potter just to name two).

Anyone who didn't appreciate that song, really doesn't appreciate music in general because that was amazing.

Go 'head on and check it out.

The Inauguration

So...um what can I say...it was awesome. My highlights of the morning...

1. Bush doing his best Nixon impression when he was getting on the helicopter.
2. The helicopter with Bush and Laura on it taking off and flying off to Andrews.
3. Malia and Sasha walking out looking precious with their grandmother behind them.
4. When CNN flashed across the screen that Obama was officially President even though the oath had yet to be taken.
5. That song Yo-Yo Ma and 'nem played. That was hotness actually. Totally loved it.
6. Obama... or should I call him President Obama now? Naw Imma stick with Obama. Anyway, that long pause he took during the oath. You know he was like... yo should I back out? LOL. Just playing.

Overall, it was awesome. And I am kinda happy I didn't spend the 400 dollars to go see it. Sheeeet it was cold and I was warm right in the law school atrium watching it. LOL.

By the way...Obama was getting it with the first dance. Not so much the "Signed Sealed Delievered" but thats fine.

Christian Audigier is the new Tommy Hilfiger

Is it just me but is the Ed Hardy/Christian Audigier brand like French Fubu? You see it everywhere and everyone feels like they have to wear it? They got knock of Ed Hardy and ish...wtf man. Well I guess maybe it could be like French Tommy Hilfiger since it is a white guy.

But still man, I am so sick of this ish. It's really not even that hot. Different colors and ish. They make me sleepy. And I love how they call it "Luxury Streetwear". Hilarious. You look like a box of crayons threw up on your shirt.

Just saying...

New Reality

Just like The Hills I am addicted to The City. I think these effers might be dumber than the ones on the hills. Sorry they are. I do like that this random dude said his shoes were super comf. I like that. Imma use that in everday life now. Oh and I do enjoy Daddys Girls. The rest of these random reality shows.

Bromace...

Is THE awfulest show ever invented. I just cannot handle it. And please explain why that African guy got a tattoo like Broady. Had he shirt off and ish with dem gross ass nipples. That was just nasty. And what is wrong with him. You answer. He is a hot ass mess.

This is just a mess. Acting like they want to be this dudes friend and ish. "This is what best friends do..." It's just random.

Oakland Riots Pt. 2

OK, so today they shut the part of downtown Oakland where the BART offices are. My mom works right across the street and she said it was pandemonium. Police in the full scale riot gear... and ish...I wonder if they have horses. They put all the buildings in the area on lockdown, so basically, my mom is locked up in her office and cannot leave. I know they are doing this for people's safety, because it is liable to get crazy after the meeting is over, but man... come on man, come on man (think of that Chris Rock skit).

The point they are making is correct and valid and needs to be made. You can't just do this kind of ish and think you can get away with it. But once again, I have a problem with the way the people are doing it. You see this on TV...people are not going to see pain and anger that the protestors feel... they are going to see rage and ignorance, and violence. That is ALL.

Now, what would the best alternative situation be? I do not know. But this is not it. Pretty sure about that.

But long story short, this WAS wrong, like the worst kind of injustice there is. BART police were trying to point to the fact that the officer (who resigned btw) might have thought he was pulling out his taser, or that the victim had a prior arrest record... REALLY? You couldnt have come up with anything better than that? The officer had already used his taser prior to this (not on the victim)... you know what side your taser is on. Come on now. And I hate when people try to use prior record as an excuse. At this venture, they didn't even know dudes history... just sad crap man.

Oh yeah, oh yeah. And the officer resigned...wtf did he think that was going to do. You explain that right now. Yes, he cannot be compelled by BART to speak anymore as he is no longer an agent of BART... but when he acted, he was an agent of BART acting under color of law. What does he think, he is going to get away? Please believe he can be tried himself in civil and criminal court. They would probably only charge him with manslaughter or some ish... but come on now...that was 1st degree murder. There were no extenuating circumstances to take that down to a lesser offense.

Just ridiculous.

"Oakland Riots"

OK, so there was a shooting at BART a couple of days ago. The police basically executed a young black man for no reason. Just all kinds of incorrect. People got pictures of it and stuff...its a big deal in Oakland right now. There are people protesting and such.... but RIOTING?

I sort of have problems with this... you are smashing businesses and people's cars who didn't do anything. Demonstrate and protest all you want to, but why are you messing up other people's property. That is just wrong. There just has to be some sort of line. Smash up the DA's office, smash up the BART office, smash up City Hall, but other people's ish who had nothing to do with it??? Come on man...come on man.

And the officer, so ridiculous. He knew what was up. Just gon' shoot a dude cuz he's black, really? More on this later.

Thoughts On This Misery Known As Law School

So....I am starting to have second thoughts again about law school. Yes, this always happens when I am about a week away from having to return to Austin. So, I am thinking, is this really for me? I am coming to realize that life is not a dress rehersal and you only get one chance. Do I really want to spend my life miserable? No I do not. I feel if I work in law, I probably will be miserable. Well, I don't know about mid size firm life, but big law, yeah I will be miserable.

BUT, if I am poor, then I will be miserable too. It's like, how do I find the balance? I am so confused right now. I mean, just like everyone, I want to be able to be able to deal with work without becoming a souless bastard AND I still want to be able to have me time and do what I want.

That not taking vacation until year 5 thing in big firms is simply not going to work for me. There has got to be some kind of life balance for me.

I wish there was some kind of viable option for me to do that does NOT involve the practice of law. I would really love to become a sports agent or doing something in real estate that doesnt really involve law. I don't know.

Maybe I am just freaking out again... who the bleep knows.

Daddy's Girls

So... how do I feel about another show about some rich girls living in LA? Not to happy. But at least they are black and it is not as grossly scripted like bunk ass Lauren Conrad. Hellsa scripted with it.

But yes, I enjoy that they have some black chicks with money that are not ghetto with it (see Real Housewives of Atlanta). This will probably be a regular on my DVR.

And its funny...I hated Run's House. I feel like I was the only one who thought that show was hot garbage.

Momma's Boys

This show is actually pretty good. Its kinda funny. But the point of this is that I am really mad they chose an unattractive dude to be a Momma's Boy... I'm just saying. I don't even know what the bleep his name is... but he is that out of shape chonkey one. I mean... he is awful to look at. Why would someone be competing for him?

I wonder if any of the girls even find him attractive. The other two, yeah maybe, but that one... oh gosh. Every time he gets on the tv, I get disgusted. Croocked mouth having self. Oh his name is Robbie, they just said it.

And what do these black girls think they are doing? Have you learned nothing from The Bachelor and Rock of Love? Black girls do not get far. Let us be real.

Just saying...still like the show though.

And I Thought Whitney Had Some Sense

All these Hills chicks are dumb as hell. I want dude to like me! I've only been dating you for a week but I want you to be exclusive.... hella whiney I need a boyfriend in my life. Gross.

Also, I'mn going to leave my job I just got a week ago to go apartment hunting, but I really want to see that random guy.Super slow on the uptake.

Mama Day Again

I wrote a long thing about the book "Mama Day" by Gloria Naylor back in 2006. I have to just say it again. This is definatley a top 3 favorite book ever and I recommend it to any and every one. This book was freaking bomb. Would love to read it again...if only I could find it...hmmmm

What Did The Five Fingers Say To The Face?

SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP!